Taking its toll

Not on me, on my Reibun. :( She can't sleep, she cries all the time because of pain and depression, I also just get this sad vibe from her. And the cutting has resumed. *Sigh* Cathy picked up the new kitten for her and brought it over and I guess she was really happy about it at first, but then she just looked at and started crying. She didn't hurt her or even put her down, but snuggled her tight and just cried. Cathy stayed a while but she had something she had to do here and I've been checking in on her every 15-30 minutes.

I know they say to not let people on the internet bother you, but these are people saying things about you. People calling you a racist and then others favoriting or retweeting it which just affirms that they think the same thing. It'll be deleted or unrecognizeable today. :(

Her last Tweets summed up this fucked up way of thinking and thin-skinned society we live in. Why not answer her question nicely? Why not discuss instead of accuse and attack? I know people are mad. I know there are racists and hate groups out there looking to disrupt, pick fights and hurt people. Her Tweet wasn't that.

I don't know why you care about humanity so much, Reibun. I lose faith in it more and more at 5:00 PM every day. That there are people like that scum on your blog in this world are proof that our society is gonna end up like Ancient Rome sooner or later. All great empires crumble eventually.

I'm not all bunnies and crazy min pins, I see what's going on in the world and I'm not fucking stupid. America loves to destroy people. Whether it be my beautiful wife by a bunch of ignornant Twits or a comedy legend like Bill Cosby.

I was raped twice, fucking violated. The first time by three girls in a shower who beat me and stuck objects and their fingers and fists in me vaginally and anally. I never reported it. My ex raped and tried to kill me and luckily I didn't have to report it because of how it worked out. A rape kit and testifying in court was almost as bad as the rape itself. If I was popular on some site or social media, do you know what kind of vile shit I'd read?

Anyway. Bill Cosby has helped kids, done all sorts of charity work and entertained millions upon millions of people and now he's brought down by a bunch of women who wanted him to help further their careers, came alone to hotel rooms, got "raped" and kept quiet for 30 years. One of these cases was in the 60's which would place it in a turbulant time for race relations. A black celebrity raping a white woman? Come on!

You're all full of shit, and I'm tired of people being torn down for sex and racism. Doesn't matter how much good they've done, doesn't matter that Rei was just asking a question, just hurt them for saying or doing the "wrong thing" and don't even look into who, why or how. Just pass judgement and be an asshole to someone that might end up being a good friend.

People are shit. I love Rei and Adrabun and the people in my life, but I really don't care what happens to the rest. I'd rather talk to Misa and Crumb than go on Twitter, honestly

Made this headband last night, I hope no one is offended by it.

Love you so very much, Reibun. ♥♥♥

"I'll build a wall and we can keep them on the other side" - Nine Inch Nails "The Fragile" 

We'll watch it burn together, babe. 

XOXO

©Lacebun Dark in association with Jello Puddin' Pops

I need this sign!

Reibun is adamant about the WATER VAMPIRES rule. ;) Now we just need a pool... JANICE!!!! lol. I took Neurontin. hehehe!

XOXO

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Just No

K, so I saw this on TV while putting out some new magazines in the waiting area. It's from the Steve Harvey talk show. He brought out a designer who makes clothes from every day things instead of fabric. The one on the far right is pretty cool. It's made from pistachios and a bunch of items from a party store. Even the pink one isn't bad. The one on the far left, though... WTF!? 

It's a "Ninja Princess" gown made from cupcake liners and has nunchuks on the bustline. It's hard to see from this, but it's so bulky and poofy and where the hell is the ninja in any of it? 

I love unique fashion and creativity, but some people just don't have it. Even Steve looked at the designer like "Really?", the model seemed uncomfortable and the crowd was sorta half out of it. Then he has to tell her how talented she is. 

I just spent like 10 minutes bitching about a 3 minute TV segment. And it was a rerun... lol 

XOXO

♥Lacebun♡

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Back at the Bun Bin

So I made it home ok, but I've decided it's gonna be a while before I fly again. Turbulence sucks, I'm not a sexist, but I hate male flight attendants, especially when they bother me every 20 seconds as an excuse to stare at my chest. *Sigh* Oh, and annoying people who kick my seat. Ugh!

But I was so happy to see my Reibun and all our critter kids! ♥ Crumb Bum was excited to see me, then ran away when I dropped a piece of luggage on the floor... Haha! I don't know if Reibun mentioned it anywhere, but we'll have our new kitten on Thursday! :) We're currently working on a name! ♥

Not much else tonight, though. Very tired and it's back to the job tomorrow.

Baby Misa and Lacebun collage! :) <3 

Misa - Creator of the Bun Revolution! :p

Hope everybun had a nice day!

XOXO

♥Lacebun♡

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Home in the morning!

I just wanted to post real quick and let everybun know that I had a good day today and it looks like my uncle is gonna be fine. :) I'll be leaving here early to go to the airport (long ride) and will be home around lunchtime. I hope everybun had a good weekend and thanks to my Bun Support Network (BSN) for being so awesome and supportive! Love you all! Nitey Nite!

XOXO

♥Lacebun♡
 
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Taking the good with the bad.

My uncle got released today! Yay! :) He's gonna spend the night here with us just so we can keep an eye on him and then we're gonna bring him home tomorrow and spend the day there. Sorry, Reibun, but I'm not sure that there will be a repeat of last night. :( I'm happy he's ok and I don't regret coming to see him, but I've been having some issues since yesterday.

I love seeing my family, but coming back here is always a mental struggle. Everything that has happened to me in this state ends up being drudged up in my mind. Whether it's something that serves as a reminder or seeing someone, I hate all of it. It makes it hard to do anything. Before I went to MA, I essentially made myself a prisoner in my own home. I even had a separate home phone line that rang differently than the regular one so I knew it was safe to answer the phone.

Anyway, I've had a few private cries and little panic episodes here and there. I've gotten so used to Reibun being there for me in moments like that and that just makes me miss her and I feel worse. One more day.

These are my fox PJ pants. While waiting for my parents to go to bed last night, I copied the pattern onto my nails.

Came out pretty good, I think! :)

Best I can do for you tonight that I can post here, Reibun! lol 

I hope everybun is having a good weekend!

XOXO

♥Lacebun♡

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Weekend in Michigan

I wish I could have come here under different circumstances. How I held it together as well as I did yesterday is beyond me. If you haven't read it on Reibun's blog, my uncle John suffered a pretty bad head injury yesterday.

When my mom called me at work, I pretty much knew something had happened to someone, she never calls there. I guess it's true that instinct just sorta kicks in during situations like that. I didn't think of anything but the fact that I had to get here and make sure he was ok. I mean, I made sure Rei knew and everything, but nothing frivolous ever crossed my mind. Not what I needed or was gonna wear or anything.

I love Janice, Cathy, Rei, Adra, all of you so much for being such an amazing support system. I don't know what I'd do without you. <3

He gave everybun here a pretty good scare and while he's not out of the woods yet, they at least know he's gonna survive at this point. The swelling in his brain has decreased and he's pretty functional right now. He'll probably be in the hospital until Saturday and after that he's gonna have a lot of doctors appointments in his future. He doesn't care much for doctors and has been neglecting his health for a long time, so they've found some other medical things he needs to address along with this.

I know everyone dies at some point. And I'm not complaining about it, but I've had an underlying sense of dread since my early teens that he and my parents will be gone long before most people have to start entertaining these thoughts. My mom is nearly 70 and she is the youngest of my core family unit. (Brianne is already dead as far as I'm concerned) If they're all alive when I'm in my late 30's, I'll be a very lucky girl. I don't like thinking about it, but this has shoved it to the front of my mind once again. *Sigh*

On to more positive things! I did end up going shopping with my mom today because I needed more warm weather clothing for here. 'Course, I ended up with like 30 other things, too. >.> My mom insisted on going to Victoria's Secret with me because "It's nothing she hasn't seen and can't handle." She couldn't handle it and I don't think she's seen a lot of the lingerie that's come out in the last 15-20 years. lol. I'm not a huge fan of that store, but I needed stuff (I actually did on that front) and it was what was available. Good thing they don't sell harness bras! lol.

It is nice being here and it's more comfortable weather-wise because we're right near the water. I wish Reibun could've come along and under different circumstances, of course. I have stuff to keep myself occupied here, but it's not the same as when we're in bed playing video games at night and she starts yelling at her game. Or Pornhub... Haha. Miss you so much, sweetie. :(

I hope everybun is having a nice day and I'll probably be online here and there throughout the weekend. :)

XOXO

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